Small Moment of Wonder

Several days ago, I was watching for hummingbirds at the feeder. My coffee was brewing, I was catching my morning breath before leaving for work. Before I could think about it again, two hummingbirds were hovering for a sip of nectar. They were beating their wings so fast, the leaves below them were whipping around like in a hurricane.

Who knew a little hummingbird could create such movement, both of the leaves and of my soul.

Ready

A quiet weekend spent with sis. Lots of reading inspirational books and resting, so that I can be ready for the upcoming weeks.

I look forward to the new learning experience.

Ready. Set. Go.

Weekend recovery...

I welcome the weekend for recovering my energy.

Since life is what we make it I am making it as wonderful as I can imagine and then some.

So be it, with harm to none and joy to all.

Precipace part two

When you face your fear, and trust in the higher power, just jump.

Either the angels will catch you or you will grow wings.

Well, my angels pasted wings on me and I am flying.

All will indeed be well.

I have become the person I am trying to help.

This is good news, I just need to wait and see why and how. I know that everything happens for a reason in the learning arena called now.

I never thought I would be one of those Starbucks homesteaders, using the computer access and an empty table. Yet here I am nursing an iced tea and trying to process.

I just looked out the window and I see a small lizard in the rose bushes near the drive through.

Hey wait a minute, this is the center of the city. Not the desert. Cars roll through less than a foot away. Yet there he is, a creature of the ancient California that was desert. Feasting on white roses and surviving in spite of the alien city he lives in.

If that little lizard can do it, so can I.

I plan to take a little while to regain my senses and find new full time work yet keep teaching at night. I plan to move to Hawaii and find work there instead. I plan to become an E-bay queen and rid my life of what to me is clutter and to others might be treasure. I plan to win the lottery. I plan to just sit here until I grow cobwebs. I plan to marry a millionaire. I plan to come through this and find something ever so wonderful on the other side. Heck, I plan to finally become an astronaut, never mind there is no space program any longer. I am still an optimist and always will be.

To the precipice. Jump.

Mid Week -- going strong

Wednesday is traditionally "over the hump" day. So many folks see it as a downhill run to the weekend.

I prefer to view it as a moment to regroup, breathe deep and bring the same, strong enthusiasm to the balance of my work week.

Yes, I totally enjoy weekends like any other person on the planet. I don't ever want to miss the moments of today because I am only looking at the weekend to come.

I know humans live in this linear time arrangement, but really, here and now is very good!

It Came Off The Wall

Last Monday, a 50 lb case came off the wall and whacked me down. My week has been one of recovery. What have I learned:

1. I am ever so glad that I was not seriously injured (Thank you, h.s.)
2. I truly miss teaching, my right livelihood.
3. I can be good, rest and heal.
4. I relish even better health.
5. When I can't read, I watch. When I can't watch, I listen. When I can't listen, I dream.

Have you rested and had a dream this week

Cleansing Tears

On Saturday we were listening to a Josh Groban concert. He is an amazing performer. One of his older songs has taken on a new meaning for me.

When I heard "To Where You Are" my tears flowed freely remembering all of the important friends, lovers and family I have lost over the last eleven years. The most recent being Herm.

Here is a photo of him in "Daddy Dog" mode. With my furry son, Passion.

They were good tears, cathartic tears, cleansing tears.

A Mind Wandering Just a Little

I have the gift of a wandering mind today. When I take a break during my day, I have wonderful thoughts of vacation spots ... dogs who were my companions ... friends no longer her in body but totally with me in spirit ... great meditation spots I have enjoyed.

Here I am from a Vision Expo from several years ago. This is the trade show for my industry: medical optics. My associate, Gaby, took this picture. We shared many laughs. Even though he is no longer on this earthly plane, his laughter and jokes will always remain with me. As will all of my lame jokes about his bald head.

What good memory come to your wandering mind right now?

To a Personal Valhalla

My sister and I enjoy playing World of Warcraft. Yes, we meditate and seek personal and world peace ... and play WOW. These activities are not really at odds with one another. So, I am a happy woman AND a level 70 Death Knight. LOL Here is the photo my sister took at the gate.

So, before trotting off to a nice lunch and a walk in the sunshine at a lovely mall, we went to the Blizzard Headquarters. The guard allowed us to stop long enough for a couple of photos. Definately a trip to Valhalla for an online gamer.

Twould be a marvelous world indeed when only avatars online die and they get to resurrect immediately. A world where real war has vanished and no more soldier graves are needed. Let us all create that world together.

One Week Plus One

It is one week since my Ex died. Four days since the funeral. I have cried myself out and now will move on. When I think of it, he partly died to me three years ago. Now I am set totally fee.

I got up today because life will go on.

Yesterday I received a shocking call: my beloved ex was found dead by his father. I know what the poets mean when they said "I crumbled." My body fell to the floor in disbelief. I couldn't get out one credible word to my sister who was standing by watching me dissolve into tears.

Today I got up and did many small, mundane tasks. I am waiting to hear when the funeral will be. I will be there for closure. I must be.

But right now it is all surreal.